33 Thoughts I Had About Halftime, Netflix’s New Jennifer Lopez Documentary

I had all these thoughts while watching the brand-new Netflix documentary Halftime, which was released today, about Jennifer Lopez. The documentary aims to demystify the legendary figure below.

  • I enjoy it when a documentary begins with “thoughtful music playing.”
  • Wow, Jennifer Lopez’s kids Max and Emme are absolutely adorable! And they have really grown! Does that imply that I’m aging?
  • I can’t be that advanced in age, because I still desire J.Lo’s cropped, bejeweled sweatsuit.
  • A sparkling coffee mug! I will not stop until I acquire one.
  • Oh, do you recall the halftime performance?
  • Laughing at baby J.Lo’s bowl cut.
  • J.Lo’s reminiscence about how much she loved West Side Story as a kid is making me long for a Rita Moreno documentary.
  • Oh my goodness, the era of the Fly Girl!
  • The extended shot of J.Lo learning to pole dance for her role in Hustlers (still upset about her Oscars snub, by the way) serves as my Rocky training sequence.
  • How can I gain unauthorized access to J.Lo’s highly encouraging family group message?
  • Definitely not a phone call between J.Lo and Shakira!
  • J.Lo refers to Shakira as “baby.” These women are forming a union!
  • J.Lo condemning Trump’s discriminatory border-wall story as “nonsense” is incredibly gratifying to me, even after all this time.
  • J.Lo’s parents, David and Lupe, are an adorable representation of “divorced parents who still have a good relationship.”
  • Hey, it’s George Clooney!
  • Hey, it’s Rosie O’Donnell!
  • Hey, it’s David Letterman!
  • “Waiting for Tonight” period, darling.
  • They were influential in shaping her career, but J.Lo doesn’t believe she was fond of those early years. However, in my opinion, we are now moving on to the more exciting and noteworthy moments.
  • Why does anyone become famous, given the late-night rumors and jokes that showcase these terrible sounds? The right money and recognition, oh, they all play a part.
  • The scene in Hustlers where J.Lo performs a striptease to Fiona Apple’s “Criminal” is constantly on my mind without any cost.
  • It is truly amazing how extensively this woman practices. I’m impressed.
  • I want to purchase this vibrant splatter-paint sweatsuit.
  • All these nostalgic photos of a younger J.Lo on the red carpet have me emotional! Oh, how time flies.
  • Hey, it’s Laura Dern!
  • Hey, it’s Quentin Tarantino!
  • Hey, it’s the outfit!
  • All I desire to witness for the remainder of my existence is J.Lo and Shakira practicing a choreographed routine in unison.
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